Evening. Well when I left my flat at 8.45 this morning, with the sky clear as a bell, I wasn’t in the best of moods if I’m being honest.
The Peer Support group didn’t happen, but I did have a one to one counselling session with my former line manager, who is a trained counsellor. I poured out my anger and resentment and barely concealed contempt for those who try to bring me down.
Let’s put it this way. Nobody will be able to right the terrible wrong of recently, but me. I will have to fight this battle. The help will be there, and I can call upon it. Some are not so lucky. But if I can beat the “system” again, then that could pave the way for others to fight back and get what is rightfully theirs.
I must thank the counsellor for allowing me to vent my spleen in this way. I feel better for getting some of this festering resentment off my chest. It’s given me a new determination again. There are people that care, and I’m foolish to think that they don’t. They can’t right the wrong. But I can, with the right help and support.
Not only that, I’ve managed to pick up a speaking engagement next Friday week. Happy with that, and that will do me good. Need to get the fight started again. But I will have bad days again, that’s for sure. Being with those who care for my well being is important. I’ve been pushing some of them away recently, as is the case when someone is hurting, they lash out at those closest to them.
When I get home, my CBT counsellor had sent me a letter to send to the DWP for their consideration. I will put everything in an envelope tomorrow and send it off. Then it will be a long and frustrating wait. But I’m determined that justice will prevail. I will not give in, that is the easy way out.
So not a bad day. Just waiting for the snow to fall in this part of London now. But before people get too excited, think about the bitter cold in the USA at present. That’s proper cold, not the stuff that lasts a day over here and clears off again. Keep warm and keep fighting.