Well, hello everyone. It’s been a very long time since I posted anything on the blog. Up until the weekend of 14/15 April, the year hasn’t been the best. There was a lot of tragedy and bad news, plus the weather was pretty dreadful, and still is. So what changed on that weekend?

If you’ve been living on the moon, then you will have missed the big world news that USA and it’s allies fired missiles at Syria for an alleged chemical weapons attack. That whole news week was filled with warlike rhetoric from the USA and Syria’s main ally, Russia. All through that week, my mind was quickly being filled with doom and disaster. This is it, I thought. We are all going to perish, and very quickly too. The day I never thought I would see was fast approaching. World War Three!!

Well, this is what happens when an anxiety riddled person like me takes too much notice of newspapers and the general media, who try and control the mind so much, it’s frightening.

The morning of Saturday 14th April was unforgettable, and not in a nice way. I was following the events from the Middle East during the night, when suddenly at 2 am, the missiles started to rain down on Syria. I lay quite still in bed, shocked rigid. A cold, eerie feeling went through my very being. I was terrified that I wouldn’t see the following day. The hour or so passed before it all stopped. The rigidity gave way to uncontrollable shaking and fright. I’m too young to die was one such thought dominating.

Then as the clock struck 5 am, I noticed something symbolic. The doom and disaster was at an end and the sun was making a welcome appearance after several months of gloom and cold. Spring is finally here! The birds were tweeting their approval and suddenly all seemed good again. But I couldn’t escape the feeling that retaliation for the dreadful and senseless bombing was just around the corner.

It is now the 29th April and I am writing this piece. So retaliation didn’t happen. I was grateful that particular night that a good friend of mine kept in touch via Facebook Messenger to mollify my fears that Armageddon was about to happen. I thank him very much for his more realistic grasp of world affairs then Allen Brooks was able to manage. The newspapers, the media, there it was. WORLD WAR!!!

I take away from this that though some of our leaders are power hungry and a little bit off the wall, when they are confronted with making a decision as to whether to vaporise us all, they look into the abyss and step back. We haven’t had a major world war since 1945 and long may that continue to be the case. Does reason come into that thinking? I’d like to think that is the case.

Now you all may comment and say “What was all the fuss about?” Well, for someone who has mental health issues like myself, catastrophising matters is a regular occurence. Even getting on a bus or going to the counsellor can be seen as an anxiety provoking event. This was much worse. But as one dark episode finished, hopefully the rest of the year can be better, less incident packed and I do feel a lot more positive about life again. Things have turned. But all the bad things happening were snowballing into something major, in my mind. Thankfully, I am alive and kicking, and looking forward to the summer.

A.S.D Brooks x




Author: allenbrooks44

44 year old adult living with Autism...