The squiggly line….

To give anyone an idea of what it’s like to live with mental illness, just draw two end points on a piece of paper. Then between those two points, draw a squiggly, convoluted line and not a straight one. That is the path that most people take with mental illness. It’s never straightforward…the squiggly lines indicate the rough days we all feel.

Like today for me. Better today, in fact it’s the best I’ve felt all week. What that’s down to, I couldn’t begin to tell you. I did sleep ok and woke up in a reasonably good mood. That pea that masquerades as my brain has decided to work today! The switch is in the on position.

Yesterday was full of aches and pains. A searing migraine and bodily aches that just indicated how shit I felt the last four days. The only time I went out since Monday was to the shop last night, and that is only a stone’s throw away. The sleep I’ve had must have been good if I feel ok today. The migraine has gone and the aches and pains are a lot less in nature. It’s as though a weight has been lifted off the shoulders, though I’m not sure what weight! All very strange.

Don’t let anyone kid you that one feels ok all the time and all this is a put on act. In fact I hate feeling like shit on most days. I’m grateful for the good days, such as they are. All is now needed is to get myself into gear for next week. I had things going on this week which had to be abandoned. Next week, similar activities are back in place and I hope to be back to normal. This is one of these blips I have from time to time, the squiggly line……

A.S.D. Brooks

Author: allenbrooks44

44 year old adult living with Autism...